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[16 Mar 2007|12:40am]
ive finally completed the piece ive been working on since this time last night. and after the last stroke was done and it was placed to hang for drying, i felt a sense of depletion, a draining of my inner workings and soul. i feel like now everything that ive ever known/felt/thought and dreamt is on this canvas, and inevitably. they're going to laugh at me..

i ended up winning an award for my painting set i recently came up with, and as crazy as it may sound..i hate it. now people are trying to buy it. im getting interviewed on juxtapoz and i feel like its just going to get thrown back in my face..
..but most of all, i feel like they're going to laugh at me.
3 represent Nrepresent that shit

[13 Mar 2007|12:15am]
breathing chaos.
but finding beauty every step of the way.
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[07 Mar 2007|12:24pm]
happy 21st birthday sisk..
..enjoy teh painting cause im not cheap, just meaningful.
take care. <33


with skin, you'll win. lol.
represent that shit

[06 Mar 2007|07:33am]
wow it honestly feels like ten fucking years since ive been on this, even though noone really fucking looks at it anyways lol.
in the course of the last time ive been on this literally a million things have occured, some for the worst. and most of all some for the best.

i pledged, rushed, and joined a fraternity. its insane living in a house with all my frat brothers, but i cant help but smile. alcohol plays a big role in this house, before i was here i wasnt the drinker..im really still not, but i can polish off a 12 like nobodys business now lol. these fuckers know/feel/act exactly like me, and if one of us is down, the rest of us are there to pick them up. and that my friend, is something ill die for.

i honestly dont know what the hell has been going on, everything is spinning all around me and i feel like i'm fighting to stay above the surface and throughout all this chaos i can see one light, so brilliant that it fucking blinds me.

lately, ive felt like a mold. a basis for ideals that'll come into play eventually in the lives/hopes of everyone around me. and every moment i proceed forward, the more i feel like im slowly but surely becoming an archetype. the machine is slowly breathing life from the hands of his maker.

i really dont know if itll make a difference, but im at a point in my life where every moment awake is something to be cherished. because at this point, i never really know when im gonna go. or where for that matter.

nevertheless i still dont know whats the point in me writing this, noone looks at this. maybe for my own personal appeasement, or maybe its some sort of venting mechanism. either way, i feel like ive accomplished something..even if it was minute. and thats all ive been trying to do from the getgo.
1 represent Nrepresent that shit

[14 Dec 2006|11:54am]
thursday, december 28th @ the Pegasus Lounge.

Sleeping Alone (awsome band back from tour)
BEHELIT (thats me)
and others TBA

it starts at 8 and ends at 3. its a college and kill the keg night. so, dont come not planning to drink.
represent that shit

[30 Nov 2006|02:22pm]
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[29 Nov 2006|07:08pm]
Entire Discographies On My IPOD:

·30 Seconds To Mars


·A Perfect Circle

·The Agony Scene

·Agoraphobic Nosebleed

·All Shall Perish

·All That Remains

·Andrew WK

·As Blood Runs Black

·As I Lay Dying

·At The Drive In

·August Burns Red

·The Berzerker

·The Black Dahlia Murder

·Bleeding Through

·The Blood Brothers

·Boys Night Out

·Brand New

·Bullet For My Valentie


·Circle Takes The Square

·Coheed And Cambria

·Cradle Of Filth

·Darkest Hour

·Death Cab For Cutie

·The Dillinger Escape Plan

·The Faint

·The Format

·From First To Last

·Frou Frou

·Glass Casket


·Haste The Day

·Hawthorne Heights


·Horse The Band

·The Human Abstract

·If Hope Dies

·Imogen Heap


·Into The Moat

·It Dies Today

·Jack's Mannequin

·Job For A Cowboy

·Kill Hannah

·Killswitch Engage


·Kottonmouth Kings

·Less Than Jake

·Letter Kills

·Lil' Flip

·Lil' Jon

·Lords Of Acid

·The Mars Volta

·Matchbook Romance

·Maylene & The Sons Of Disaster

·Misery Signals

·The Misfits


·On Broken Wings

·Panic! At The Disco


·Postal Service

·Project Pat

·Scary Kids Scaring Kids

·Senses Fail

·She Wants Revenge

·Slim Thug

·Still Remains

·Taking Back Sunday

·Tenacious D

·Three Six Mafia


·Trillville/Lil' Scrappy




·Violent Femmes

·White Zombie

·The Yeah Yeah Yeahs

oh and my dad is about to die..
more info later.
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[27 Nov 2006|11:34pm]



(insert panic here.)
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[24 Nov 2006|07:25pm]


and i <3 my gf.
happy anniversary.
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[16 Nov 2006|08:16pm]
me and my baby in bunny form.

my day at the petstore!Collapse )
1 represent Nrepresent that shit

[09 Nov 2006|11:21am]
so, where the fuck did this week go? like, it went right out the door. literally.
tommorrow is friday, and the weekend is back with a vengeance.

today is band photos.
this sunday is hellogoodbye.
next saturday is the blood brothers.

and i was thinking of putting the butcher knife on my sleeve next week.
yay or nay?

and here are some videos that everyone NEEDS to watch:

Crossing The Rubicon by The Human Abstract

watch the guitarists and bassist in this song...they're crazy. literally.

My Fears Have Become Phobias by As Blood Runs Black

everyone needs a drummer like this, watch the ending.

and everyone should listen to Imogen Heap because shes amazing. <33

Headlock by Imogen Heap

oh and i forgot.
im selling custom art on canvas, any buyers?
3 represent Nrepresent that shit

[05 Nov 2006|03:46am]
you know what i hate?

living in a house full of people who are inconsiderate to the fact that im a vegetarian. can you at least buy me some fucking lettuce or something so i can eat? or better yet, how about a loaf of bread so i can at least make a grilled cheese man. its 3 in the godamn morning, i havent had a bite to eat since about 2 in the afternoon on friday and im hungry. i go and look in my pantry..oh wow. no fucking food. fridge? nope, meat meat and more fucking meat.

kill me quick. please..
im fucking starving.
7 represent Nrepresent that shit

[29 Oct 2006|09:42pm]
happy birthday babe.
even though you wont see this until you get back from south america :/
imu and ilu.


Better get on yo job, tell'em, haters get on yo job, nigga (Motivation)
Nigga, get on yo job, tell'em, haters get on yo job, nigga (Motivation)
Haters better get on yo job, tell'em, haters get on yo job, nigga (It's motivation)
Sucka nigga, get on yo job, if ya, hatin' get on yo job, nigga

You can look me in my eyes, see I'm ready for whatever
Anythang don't kill me, make me better
I ain't dead nigga, you can take the fame and the chedda
And the game, and the deal, I'm still a go-getter
Take my freedom for the moment but it ain't fo-ever
I got the spirit of a god, heart of a dope dealer
I'm a king, seen hangin' with some cold killas
I ain't never back down or ran from no nigga
I ain't sat down yet, pimp, standin' gorilla
Even if I'ma all alone or standin' with four niggaz
Tell'em jump, pimpin' it don't get no realer
5'9" with the soul of a 6'4" nigga

I separated the fakes, paralized from the waist down
From the real stand up guys of the A-Town
Can't even look me in my eyes, put yo face down
I'm outta jail nigga, whachu gotta say now?

Niggaz fakin' only gonna inspire (Motivation)
All yo hatin' is fuel to my fire (It's motivation)
Niggaz plottin' on the crown soft droppin' (It's motivation)
Hey but I ain't slowin' down and I ain't stoppin' (Motivation)
Now nigga don't stop my show (Motivation)
You ain't know I don't stop, I go (It's motivation)
Sucka niggaz can't make me suffer
Just make me stronger and make me tougher (It's motivation)

To be locked in a box niggaz happy to see
Put anybody on top, any rapper but T, I, P
But back to reality G, O.D. still carryin' me, nigga I run this
Spread yo rumours, kick all yo lil' dumb shit
Tell lies, laugh 'bout the time that I'm gon' get
If it make you feel better, picture me over and done with
Punk bitch, come with all the gossip you can come with
Small thang to a giant, I can overcome this

Jail, I don' done this, rap I'm just havin' fun with
I could be a local joker, never have one hit
Nigga, "New Finish" alone'll get me dumb rich
While these rappers sellin' records gettin' pennies
If Grand Hustle sell any, I'ma get plenty
If God with me, who could be against me sucka?
Can't make me suffer, just make me tougher
represent that shit

[28 Oct 2006|10:13am]
saw 3 was amazing.
my new hoodie my gf got me is even better.
band practice in about an hour.
dinner tonight at red lobster.
day off.
and twins!

so..for halloween, i think im going to be a dinosaur with a machinegun..
represent that shit

[27 Oct 2006|06:16pm]
im good, i follow the rules.
mmm. raise.
but not as tasty as fridays.
represent that shit

[27 Oct 2006|02:39am]
im not a robot, but ive got a mechanical hand. :(
1 represent Nrepresent that shit

[23 Oct 2006|11:07am]
so..i started on my tattoos on my left arm friday.

i would of never imagined actually getting my own artwork finally put on me.
other people have my artwork on them, but not me..

all this hatin' is fuel to my fireCollapse )
4 represent Nrepresent that shit

[18 Oct 2006|02:42pm]
"Irrelevant of the timing, I woke up this morning unable to look myself in the mirror..
which is something I should've lost the ability to do a long time ago.
I don't know how the hell anyone else does.

My chest is clenching so tightly it hurts, and the sun hasn't even risen.

Just like everyone, you're[ve] gonna watch[ed] me fall and [never even think to reach]jumped out and catch me.
..I lied."

".leave never would you, you show could I If"

I was playing with your hair, and you said, "The summer isn't over yet but..I feel like the trees are already dead."
"Maybe that's just something inside of you that's been blooming and dying for years."

to you contortionist,
bottoms up to better days.
represent that shit

[17 Oct 2006|01:41pm]
wow, alot can change in the course of a year.
but always..
bad things come in threes.
remember that.
1 represent Nrepresent that shit

[15 Oct 2006|10:20pm]

and friends.

this must be love.
because it took way too long to get to a point ive never been before..
on a further note,
ive destroyed my past.
all my memories, triumphs, and failures are an erased memory.

and this isnt a movie where ill go back through my head to save them, because nothing in this world could make me. what i have today, is something ive been chasing for 4 years now. its called success. and i would of never done it without you.

found inspiration moving forward.

fatally yours.
1 represent Nrepresent that shit

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